No matter how much the relationship is flash and burn at first, things start to get a little stale after a while; people fall into a rut, they get busy, and they forget the passion that made everything so interesting in the beginning. After a while, both parties start to wonder what was so special about such a normal, boring relationship. If you want to avoid falling into that trap, or you are already there and want to get out of the rut, here are some suggestions on ways in which you can spice things up in the bedroom. Remember that it’s always best to talk things over with your partner as he/she might not like some (or all) of the ideas here.Break the Routine and Go Out
The first thing to do is to forget the routine. If date night is Wednesdays and Saturdays, forget your plans and have an impromptu date on a day when you are both suddenly free. You don’t have to do anything fancy, just ordering pizza and cracking open a bottle of soda is enough, as long as you do something different than usual. If you do a rote dinner out every week just for the sake of it, forget going out, stay in and order some Chinese. If your routine involves staying in, put on some fancy clothes and go out. Whatever you do, do something that is not routine.
Try a Seductive Tantric Massage
Anyone can do a massage, but a tantric massage requires more. Tantric is the art of concentrating energy onto one spot, be that mentally, physically or spiritually. An erotic tantric massage wouldn’t necessarily include actual sex – although it can become part of your package.
Try a nuru massage, where both the masseuse and the receiver are covered only in oil and the masseuse uses his/her entire body to give a body-to-body massage. Watch some videos online to figure out how to do this in a way that it won’t hurt your partner in anyway and will make them relax and feel pressure. The goal is to make the receiver trust the masseuse implicitly, so try to mimic their techniques as best you can.
Go Fifty Shades on Each Other
BDSM gets a bad rap but there are many people who practice it as a lifestyle and/or sexual choice in a safe environment. If pony straps are too much for you, try some simple gadgets like handcuffs and paddles to start off with. Bring role play into your bedroom to make things more interesting. Power play is a perennial favourite: cops, nurses, doctors, teachers etc. Comic and other popular culture characters also make regular appearances in people’s fantasies – Princess Leia of Star Wars fame in particular. This requires a lot of trust in each other, but that is exactly why taking some risks in the bedroom might pay off, by forcing you to become intimate again.